What to Do When Your
Girlfriend has A Sexual Past
Do you find that you get jealous discovering your girlfriend has a sexual past? Or by thinking about the sexual past of a woman you're interested in or seeing?
A woman having a sexual past can bother a lot of guys. It can create jealousy. And jealousy in any relationship with a woman will weaken it.
It will destroy trust.
Overcoming jealousy that's been triggered by discovering your girlfriend has a sexual past must be dealt with. And YOU'RE the one who has to learn to deal with it.
This is YOUR issue. Not hers.
If you're already in a relationship, perhaps this issue has already come up. Thinking about it, how did you respond finding out that a girlfriend has a sexual past?
If you responded with jealousy, read on...
But I suggest learning to deal with this issue before the situation arrives. Prepare for this situation BEFORE you even meet a women.
Here are my suggestions...
Assume She Has a Sexual Past
I suggest not only expecting, but ASSUMING that every woman you meet or date HAS a sexual past. With the exception of some extremely religious and unattractive women, this is a reality.
Assume she's done some wild things. Assume a future girlfriend has a sexual past. Resolve to accept it beforehand. That way if the topic does come up in the future, it won't destabilize you in any way.
You're prepared for discovering a girlfriend has a sexual past.
How do you do this? By making a shift in your attitude and perspective of women. You need to see women in their true light.
First, what's past... is history. Make it an aim to not even care about her sexual past. After all, it happened before you even met her. It's none of your business, and it really has no reflection on your relationship with her.
Instead, focus on your own sex life and your relationship with her. That's what counts.
Second, women will sometimes bring up their sexual history. They do it intentionally. Why? They want to know what your perspective is.
They want to know whether you're the jealous type. She simply wants to reveal your character.
And if you get upset, she's going to think about moving on. But if you keep your cool by not letting it phase you, it will increase her attraction for you because you've demonstrated that you're in control of your emotions.
Respond in a casual manner, like you're barely paying attention. And then redirect the conversation.
Of course, dealing with this issue must first be resolved in your mind...
It Has Nothing to Do with You!
Why do guys get jealous when they discover a girlfriend has a sexual past? Why do they get that sinking feeling in their stomachs?
The simple answer is, they somehow think it reflects them.
What they've done is painted this ideal picture of an innocent and perfect woman. When they find out who she really is DOESN'T match who they thought she was, their world seems to crumble.
They take it personally. It hurts their pride because they feel betrayed.
The cause is that they weren't seeing women for who they actually are. Women are completely sexual in nature.
The truth is women have sex. And the more beautiful they are, the more likely they are to have had more sex with more partners.
If you find the thought that a girlfriend has a sexual past puts a knot in your stomach, there are some considerations worth making...
The reason that a woman with a sexual past bothers guys is that he sees it as an assault on his pride. He thinks -- somehow -- that he's less valuable by finding out his girlfriend has a sexual past.
Which is RI-DIC-U-LOUS.
Not only does he feel less valuable, but he also feels jealousy towards HER. Because she's had more sexual experiences than him, he may feel inadequate or like he's even missed out.
In which case, he needs to fulfill his true inner desires. He should consider whether he really wants to be in a committed relationship or "play the field" first...
... for himself.
All in all, never let a woman's choices affect the way you view yourself, or your own self-esteem. Because if you do, you're kindling the fires of jealousy.
Jealousy is a symptom of feeling unworthy. And if you're letting a woman cause you to feel unworthy, you're likely placing your own value on her instead of yourself.
Your girlfriend has a sexual past? As long as she has the character and personality you want in a woman AND she's not breaking any commitments she made to you, there's no reason for it to matter.
How to Become a "Natural" with Women
Your Friend,
Jay Julio
